Art appreciation day

Today we went to a free family fun day at the Rochester Art Center where the kids get to do an art project. We've done this twice before and it's always ended up being fun. I thought Brecklen would really enjoy today's theme of "steamroller art." We cut out shapes and stuck them to a square piece of cardboard. Then we painted over the shapes, stuck a piece of paper on top and a real steamroller rolled over the art. That was the best part. In the end the art was on the paper. They turned out really cool and I am even considering framing them. Brecklen's art titled "Fish" is an under the sea theme, and Hannah's is titled "Horsey" and has a horse and butterfly on it. It was actually very official. When Breck and Hannah's art was done being steamrolled, titled and signed, they put the Rochester art center stamp on it and this art organization put their official seal on it. Each kid's art got a number, Brecklen is 700, Hannah 701. They are officially part of the 1000 print summer steamroller project. They took a photo of each child with their finished product. I forgot to ask them about what they are actually going to do with all of the photographs.

Brecklen's Art- "Fish"

Hannah's Art- "Horsey"

After we were done were were allowed free admission into the Art center. I thought we might as well take advantage of this. I didn't want to miss the opportunity to be a great parent by "culturally educating" my children when I get the chance. I didn't know anything about the current exhibit, but really did it matter? Well, maybe. My first clue should have been when I walked in and sitting at the reception desk was a girl who looked like she would work in a New York City art center, or a cafe. Very cosmopolitan artsy cropped jet black hair, bangs cut straight across. She asked me if I had heard of Roman Signer. Ummm, that would be a no. Apparently he does sculptures. Well great. I guess I like sculptures. I am not really an art person. I don't quite understand the magnificence of modern art. I do appreciate it though, or at least try. I do enjoy beautiful art when it is pleasing to the eye, but don't understand why some people are highly regarded when they splatter paint on the canvas and call it "art." My kids can do that.

This exhibit was of Roman Signer's "art sculptures". He is apparently "regarded as one of the most important contemporary artists working in Europe today." We walk upstairs to see the exhibit, and Brecklen and Hannah start to go over to this pan sitting on something so it is off the ground, in the middle of the hallway. I don't have a clue as to why it's there, but wanted to leave it be incase the owner comes back. I told them not to touch it and escorted them into the exhibit room. So we walk into where I thought was the art and immediately think "oh no, kids, don't touch anything. Is THIS the art?" It was a mother's nightmare. Hazards everywhere. 6 shiny metal fans on high speed blowing air up toward the ceiling. Above each fan was a very large glass whiskey bottle hanging by string from the ceiling blowing around because of the fan below it. They wanted to touch everything. Brecklen started to grab one of the whiskey bottles (well within his reach might I add) and I asked him not to. I am really not a freak about child hazards, but we are in a museum and I wasn't exactly sure if this was the exhibit, but I certainly don't need my kids getting their fingers chopped off by sticking them in one of the many accessible fans, nor trip on one of the multiple cords lying everywhere, nor reach up to grab a very large and what would be heavy glass bottle of whiskey (for a child) hanging by string from the ceiling only to have to take them to the ER and explain why they smell like alcohol, have no fingertips, and have glass stuck in various parts of their body because of the glass shards that flew everywhere. Plus I didn't want to have to pay for breaking any part of an exhibit. Although I could just stop by Walmart and pick up a new exhibit and set it up myself.

Needless to say we weren't in that room for too long. We go back out in the hallway, past the pan on the ground. I still wonder why it is there. Then I know when I see the next "exhibit". It looks like someone is unpacking their stuff in a garage. There is random stuff everywhere. I wasn't sure if we are supposed to be there because it seems they are right in the middle of unpacking an exhibit. There are no signs anywhere to suggest what these things mean. I shoved all of the papers they gave me at the front in my bag as I chased my kids into the museum, so I didn't realize what all this stuff was, not until I got home and read it, and then it was more hilarious. Again I have the same feeling of panic as we entered this room. I Asked them not to touch anything. There is a riffle on the ground as soon as we enter the room, and Hannah runs right towards it ready to pick it up. I am freaking out. Don't need to test that to see if there's no bullets in it. So what we see is a riffle just laying on the ground with a long runner in front of it thats pushed up in the middle so that if you shot the gun the bullet would go through the "hole" under the carpet pushed off the ground and hit the target also just sitting on the ground. Hannah wanted to run on the carpet, which would completely ruin the "art sculpture." I couldn't believe this is what they were calling sculptures. None of this stuff he sculpted. These are things already in existence. For example. A bike. He is calling that his sculpture. No, that's quite offensive to the person who actually came up with the design of that bike. A solar-panelled suit case Again, not really a sculpture. My personal favorite was a large walk-in freezer just sitting in a random room. Brecklen asked what it was. I told him I didn't know (when we first saw it). He said that if you walk in it your brain will explode. The way he said it was so serious, like aliens sent it here as a device to kill mankind. It was very funny. Then I looked inside (it didn't open-thankfully) and there above all things beautiful and inspiring was a lone bicycle wheel stuck in a block of ice. I just started laughing and showed the kids what was inside. All I could envision was someone getting their bike wheel stuck in a Minnesota snowy winter. Hey, atleast it was true art though. Not some pot, or bike just sitting there.

As I read a little more about him, he really shouldn't have been in a museum. He does things with these props he is calling "sculptures." He really needs a Vegas show instead. On the way out we saw a few clips of what he is renowned for. Riding in a kayak on a gravel road being pulled along to me isn't really art, that's science. Or sitting in a chair with a rocket strapped to his arm making him go in circles isn't exactly fascinating or artsy either. Well, Kudos for something, but I'm not sure what. These things never had any explanation behind it. Now I know he probably used the bike for something, but to call that his "sculpture" is just not right to me. It was just poorly done. It just seems to me that any 15 year old boy could have his own exhibit if he video tapes himself on a skateboard, and then puts his mom's pot on the ground alongside his own fan with his stash of beer he has in his room.

So, if your not bored already, and have actually gotten this far, this prompted me to reach deep down and find my inner artist that has just been waiting to be unleashed. I would like you to check out my first ever attempt at art, inspired by Signer. Now I would like to hear comments back from you like "truly amazing", "one of a kind", and "humorous, yet innovative."

"Superheros"

"Potty in the Kitchen"- my personal favorite

"Chair"

"Bear with ears "

"Shoes as they lay "

"Quiet and Efficient" AC that cost so much it just deserves to be here.

"Bike on lawn"

"Weedwaker in neighbor's yard"


"Light "


"Babies"

"Pile of Shoes"

"Monster trucks"

http://rochesterartcenter.org/